Reinspired

I've been inspired to get back to blogging. Or just communication, in general. I've been pretty bad about keeping in touch with people through Facebook, etc. For a while the most it's been is a sporadic status update or an occasional Google chat conversation.

Wow....my last post was July! Sheez....

Okay, I guess the key to successfully remaining committed to something like this is to keep it small, manageable.

So today was my friend Helen's 49th birthday. I just baked iced pumpkin cookies (this is a tried and true recipe that I highly recommend. Plus, if you gather all these ingredients, you'll have everything you need for homemade pumpkin pie, too). We're celebrating tonight!

TGIF

I remember watching the Friday night line-up of shows that made up TGIF: Hanging with Mr. Cooper, Boy Meets World, Sister Sister, etc. Boy, those were great shows. I didn't even know about cable television back in the day - and I was content without it.

I'm glad today is Friday. It's time to rest and time to play!

Snowmen melting

Every so often these past couple weeks, I catch myself dreaming about wearing scarves again. I cannot wait for scarf weather to return. Sharp winds catching bright cheeks. Burrowing deeper into a scarf. Hugging the warmth.

It's been over 105 degrees the majority of the last several weeks. I need relief.

In other news, I've found my alternative calling in case this whole journalism thing flops - painting!

Just kidding, but really I've been doing some serious painting lately, of the HGTV sort. Tomorrow, I'll be going down to Apple Valley with a group of folks to paint inside Dariesa's new house. About three weeks ago, a bunch of us got together to paint the outside of Melody's house. According to some observers, I've got a pretty mean rolling technique. I'm working on honing that skill. Perhaps it can earn me a dollar or two one day. Maybe.

What time is it?

Holy shmoly, it's been practically three whole months of solid abandonment. Sorry. Not that you were incessantly checking or anything, but I don't like creating a blog and then being flaky. How about a quick Cliff Notes version of a life update?

1. Gym: I joined this gym that's less than five minutes from where I live and it has suddenly become my second home. If I'm bored, I just go there. I've become one of those people who have "gym friends." It still weirds me out a little. I've gotten hooked on the early morning yoga classes. I'm starting to sound pretty cliche, right? Anyway, I'm loving this new hobby, it's making me feel a lot healthier, and I'm actually committing to it - not just going gung-ho then fizzing out.

2. Home: I went home to Oregon over Memorial weekend, which was strangely not relaxing but a lot of fun. Usually when I go home my parents just want me and my brother to hole up and not go anywhere out of their sight, but they actually planned activities to do (all together, of course), which was cute. We went hiking at a waterfall, BBQed on the back porch, watched Slumdog Millionaire, played lots of ping pong, and rode the new downtown Portland tram (okay, it's not really new, but it's new to me since I hadn't ridden it before). Overall, A+.

3. Work: I'm the most senior reporter now. Not very impressive, really. It just means everybody has left and new people have replaced them. But regardless, I feel like I'm sort of responsible for "stuff" now. Uh-oh, better be careful.

4. Atlanta: I surprised Heej for her 25th birthday and got to catch up with many Atlanta friends. It felt so wonderful to be back there...and to not be in school. I really missed being in a car full of girls, or eating good Asian food, or just talking face to face. Sigh, so good. Overall, A+. The plane ride over there, however, with an early flight out of Vegas was brutal, B-.

5. Hiking boots: I just bought a pair of Timberland hiking boots and plan to wear 'em down this summer. My first excursion is going to be in two weeks. It's just a day trip, but it'll involve multiple water bottles, sunscreen and trail mix, so you better believe it's gonna be intense. And awesome.

That's all for now. I'll be around more often. It's summer time!

One last time

True story.

I once knew a girl from college who was a true Southern bell. She lived next door in my freshman dorm. We became friends sometime mid-year.

She could be jubilant for ordinary reasons, like no one I've ever met. Kindness came easily to her. We were on the crew team together for almost a year. She was everyone's doll.

She had complex issues in her life, that neither you nor I, God forbid, will ever face, but it was quickly apparent that the friendship she offered was uncomplicated.

A little less than a month ago, I found out some heartbreaking news.

The girl had passed away just after fulfilling one of her dreams: meeting actor Chris North (aka Mr. Big from Sex in the City) in, where else, New York City.

And as the realization hit me, my thoughts immediately went to all the times in the past that I had told myself to write, call, send a Facebook message, or even text a "hey." We'd fallen out of touch the last year or so of college. But in my mind, there would always be another time to really catch up with her, to make minor amends for having let our friendship fall by the wayside. I wasn't hurt - I didn't think she was hurt (I hoped, at least). We had just disconnected.

Since hearing of her death, I've had a tugging feeling of regret. I am sorry.

Then last night, I fell asleep. I hadn't been thinking about my friend in a few days, but she appeared in my dream. I was standing in line somewhere - an airport or a department store - when I saw someone coming up to me and realized it was her.

Before I got out a word of apology, she just hugged me.

And then my alarm woke me up.

California, with the Terminator at the helm

I have no idea what could have possessed Arnold Schwarzenegger to run for California governor. But now that our state's dealing with a $41.6 billion budget crisis, everyone hates him and he has to wrangle all the people up in Sacramento to help get the state out of this mess. I don't envy him.

This has been on my mind lately because being that deep in the hole at a state level has deeply affected school districts across California, including in Barstow. Tonight I got back from close to six hours of back-to-back meetings about potentially closing three schools in one of our districts because there simply isn't money to keep the doors open and pay teachers.

Sure, this isn't the first time talk of shutting down schools has cropped up, but there's a palpable desperation in the air when person after person stands before the school board and pleads - all with different causes (teachers, parents, principals) - to spare their school. It's such a cruel situation.

So what can be done? People write letters and send emails to legislators in Sacramento. Sixth graders compile lists of how they think the district can cut the necessary $5 million from next year's budget (their ideas range from changing the cafeteria food to installing energy efficient bulbs, all cute and not nearly enough). Teachers write letters to my editor, parents call me to vent, principals ask me to cover a story about their school, eager to cast any positive light as the inevitable axe gets ready to fall.

But mostly, we wait. The state, and hence the district, is in so deep that not much can be done at this point, besides swallowing hard and waiting for the school board to hand down its decision. I anticipate there'll be a firestorm upon announcing which schools will be shuttered. I already have an inkling which one's they'll be, and I'm already dreading writing that story.

Happy Inauguration Day, folks!

Flying solo

This past summer, I did the unthinkable - or at least what I previously believed to be unthinkable. I lived with five other girls. In a three bed apartment. And shared one room among three people.

I think I was inwardly cranky about the whole idea at first, but it quickly grew on me. It was comforting to be surrounded by lots of people, even if it meant sinkfuls of dishes on occasion or empty bags of potato chips laying out on the coffee table for weeks.

Now that I live by myself, I have to learn to live with myself. With.

It's a funny thing to spend time with yourself, by yourself, for an extended period of time. Past the point where it's fun or relaxing. It's a solemn place to be.

I crashed on my futon after work today while some sitcom droned on in the background. When I woke up, it was about an hour or so until it would be my normal bedtime. I didn't get up and just laid there, thinking a little.

Contrary to popular belief, I don't think all that much. Reflecting on myself, my character, behavior, habits, goals, isn't always an easy or pleasant task to endure. It takes, for me, a mighty level of brainpower to reflect on things in a productive, meaningful, fruitful fashion - in a way that elicits change. For me, the the purpose of reflection is change.

Looking back, I see it was a lot easier not to be as reflective while constantly being surrounded by people. Some people can swing it - I'm the type that actually needs physical space and seclusion. I like being surrounded by friends, and I want to go back to that kind of environment. But if my current living situation is any indication, I think there's something I am needing to gain from being alone. What is it? I don't know exactly. Maybe more thinking, changing, and thinking, changing. I feel a shift in the winds. It's a new season.

A year in review

Hello there! I'm going to turn a new leaf in 2009 and begin blogging faithfully (or at least a bit more regularly) once the new year starts. I think I'll be changing the name and theme of this blog as well.

But before looking ahead, here's a look back at the year, in photos. The photos piece together a pretty eventful year of change, stopping, starting again, firsts, lasts, big moves across the country and small steps towards growing. I'm starting from the present and working back to the start of the year, which was oh so long ago.

I can hardly believe so much has passed during this year - I went from graduating to being jobless to being jobful (I made that up). And that's just the skeleton - these photos put some meat on those bones.

My first Christmas away from home, in Barstow.

Ikea threw up in my living room.

The nuts and bolts of it.

My new room - it looks bare here, and has since improved in looking more home-y.

The first breaking of bread in my new home.

On the road, from Atlanta to Barstow.

Checking out the Jamestown Sun in North Dakota.

A walk in the park while in Savannah, visiting Leah.

Chef Liu's one night.

Heej and I after our first 5K together.

Rhoda and I discovered we share the same birthday.

Meeting Jessie for an afternoon romp around downtown Chattanooga.

Picnic lunch at Chastain Park while Grace was in Atlanta, avoiding Hurricane Ike.

Lee and Mike got married.

Watching the Olympics while in Stevens Point, Wisconsin.

My AJC mentor, Eileen, and I reporting on a radio show interview.

A random and beautiful night at Spring Hall with oodles of free drinks and goodies.


Hanging with Emory friends during the summer.


First time visiting Jessie's family in Oak Ridge.


I went on a solo hike.

Fourth of July at Centennial Olympic Park, where Grant performed.

Moving into 1413 was one of the biggest events of the year.

Saw a cool exhibit at the High Museum.

Grads!

Checked out the Botanical Garden for the first time.

Lots and lots and lots of ACF, with Lydia and Jane.

Visited my cousin Sam in New York.

I got new glasses last January. Not that big a deal.

But now, they remind me a little of Sarah Palin glasses....doh!

So long, 2008.

2009, we await!

Winter wonderland

It snowed in the desert today, more specifically in Barstow. Check my first video for the Desert Dispatch right here.

Another day, another chapter

Hello from sunny California! I completed my second full day of work today and I'm glad to be turning in for the night soon. I think my body forgot a little bit what it's like to be busy. I don't think I've been truly busy since college or maybe a bit this summer during a particularly intense work week. Anyway, I'm happy to be working, to be busy, to have a schedule, to be starting this all.

I know I'm not suppose to blog about work (per a few recommendations I've received) but I'll just give a brief summary. My co-workers are super down-to-earth, which I love. My boss is fairly laid back and let's the reporters work independently. I found an apartment that's less than 10 minutes from work, so that's definitely a blessing. And today, I actually started sort of making friends.

Overall, it's starting to feel less scary out here. I'm out in the middle of nowhere (note: this is not hyperbole in my case), but at least I'm starting to get to know some of the people here.

I'm excited about my job duties, which will have me primarily reporting on education and the military (Fort Irwin, a large military training base, is about 40 minutes away and is a large chunk of the people here). There are two school districts, and today I scheduled a meeting with the superintendent of one of them just to introduce myself to her as the new ed beat reporter and learn more about the district.

Oh, one bad thing was yesterday I had to sit through a 4 hour city council meeting. I'm not even covering government, but I had to tag along with another reporter just to go to observe. It ended almost at 11:30 pm. It was way past my bedtime. I wanted to crawl under the uncomfortable chair I was sitting in and close my eyes.

But other than that, things are pretty aok....

On another note, I'm still deciding just what to do with this blog. I want to continue blogging, but I need a change in direction. Any suggestions are welcome!

On the road again

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9 days left

Today was an unremarkable day. I drove under a cloudy sky and did a bunch of errands. I'm getting ready to leave. Packing is always such a monstrous task. Actually, the only reason today merits a post is because I figured out that my last day in Atlanta will be Friday, the 21st. So much to do, so little time!

My days are numbered...in Atlanta

Without further adieu, here it is: I'm moving to California.

I decided to take their offer and will begin working for the Desert Dispatch on Dec. 1. It took a lot of thinking and weighing to come to this decision and all I can say for now is that I'm determined to make it the right decision. Am I happy with the choice? Well let's just say I'm cautiously allowing my excitement to grow...

There's a lot to do now. I need to find an apartment in Barstow, figure out the logistics of moving, and then execute another cross country roadtrip with my dad (this one will be No. 3). I'm not sure when I'm leaving Atlanta yet, but I'll update once it's figured out.

We're having a 1413 roommate dinner tonight. It feels like goodbyes are already starting to creep in...a last this and a last that. A sobering thought that tempers the excitement.

I've been blizzarded

I had my interview today. It was very formal. I think it was a good two-way conversation, where they got to know me more and vice versa. It was three vs. me again. They said they'd call me by early next week.

It started lightly snowing in Jamestown around 3 p.m. The local forecast has predicted a blizzard to hit around midnight tonight. Needless to say, my 7 a.m. flight out of here tomorrow got cancelled. Now, I get to play in the snow and make snowmen until my rescheduled afternoon flight. I wish I brought my mittens...and had friends to enjoy the snow with...

I feel so tired and bloated right now. All that happens on interview trips is eating and talking. Going to restaurants and eating and talking. Then sitting in conference rooms and talking some more. Then going on driving tours of the town and listening to someone else talking. Talking is tiresome.

I'm ready to go home. For the first time in my life I'm wishing, "please don't snow too much."

Uh-oh

I think I have a problem on my hands.

I arrived in Jamestown, North Dakota, this afternoon. The publisher met me at the airport and took me straight to the Jamestown Sun offices where I got the standard building tour and drive-by staff intros. They gave me some copies of the newspaper and ushered me to my motel until dinner (they say "supper"). I was very impressed with the site visit, though it was brief. I also sensed a very high standard of professionalism here (which - now in retrospect - was lacking at the Desert Dispatch). So far, this seems like a pretty good place.

And that's a problem.

I was actually banking on it not being great. Or at least not better than the Desert Dispatch. Because that way, I would have seen enough to have soundly made up my mind by Thursday night that I wasn't missing out on anything here. Then, I could call the editor in Barstow on Friday and tell him to expect me in two weeks. And then I would not be in this very problematic position of an offer that very well may expire if I don't answer in two days while I'm just barely starting to seriously interview with the editor in Jamestown, who may or may not offer me anything in the next week or so.

Basically, I'm (very inconveniently) growing attached to something I had no intention of liking, and was only suppose to serve as reaffirmation to take the California offer.

Problem-o.

In the worst case scenario, I'd turn down California, wait on ND, not get an offer from ND, and then just move in with my brother. Which, like I said before, isn't the end of the world. But, ugh, the thought is just gut wrenching. I'd like to see some fruit from my now four month running job search.

My first in-person interview with the Jamestown Sun is tomorrow. It should be fine. Fun, even. It's the weighing and wondering what'll happen afterwards that'll be more difficult to navigate.

To Barstow and back...

Welcome, Mr. President

Yesterday in (brief) review

Gonna make this quick...here are some initial thoughts after visiting the Desert Dispatch:

1. The newspaper is smaller than I'd like, but it has a lot of potential.
2. Barstow is more of a community than I imagined - I was thinking it'd be a glorified truck stop.
3. The desert is sort of cool. Sort of.
4. I broke my red meat fast. They have In-N-Out in Barstow (I'm not about to be a prisoner of my own rules).
5. There's awesome shopping in Barstow, since it's a mid-desert tourist stop and all.
6. I have lots to think about now. They want an answer by Friday latest.
7. Get out and vote today!

'Tripping to Barstow tomorrow

Hello from the West coast! I'm here in L.A. now and getting ready to settle in for the night since tomorrow will be a pretty big day. I'm driving out to the Desert Dispatch in Barstow, Calif. tomorrow morning which is about a two hour drive north east.

I'm planning on staying there for most of the day and will have lunch with a reporter and probably get a driving tour of the city (we could probably afford to walk it, but for the heat...). I'm excited, nervous and hopeful. It may (or may not) be where I end up. For those who I haven't updated, I'm going to be in one of three places as of the first week of December. Either:

1. Barstow, CA
2. Jamestown, ND
3. Dallas, TX

I'm hoping either the first two, because that'll mean I've gotten a job. If Dallas - well - that'll be okay, too. My brother lives there = free room + board + infinite mooching. And that'll mean that the adventures of The Search will continue as well.

On a different note, I had a long talk on the phone with my brother yesterday and he challenged me to look at my career choice more critically. He mainly wanted me to consider things like job security, location, and future lifestyle choices. I guess it doesn't really put my family at ease to see that the direction I'm heading is a low salaried shrinking industry, largely located in obscure places and an unconventional (for my family's standards) career track.

I take what my family thinks into consideration a lot. Often the line gets blurred between what they want for me and what I think I want for me. Getting my first real job is the first really independent thing I would do - it would make a statement to my family. It separates and distinguishes you from your family, which used to be your primary identity. It's a responsibility that starts to carve out who you want yourself to become, and all the consequences - good, bad, purposeful and unintentional - that come along with that choice.

I feel like college spat me out as a shapeless blob - full of ideas but unformed by the authentic clash of real world variables like time, money, conflicting values, bosses, and problems that demand solutions rather than just debate, to name a few. I'm ready for that molding, that chipping process to begin.